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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26512963">touch me, tease me, fill me up</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MVforVictory/pseuds/MVforVictory'>MVforVictory</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band), WAYV</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Bathing/Washing, Bottom Liu Yang Yang, Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten-centric, Crying, Dom Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Dom/sub, Dubious Consent, Happy Ending, Liu Yang Yang-centric, M/M, Miscommunication, Overuse of the word 'baby', Past Rape/Non-con, Please read the Author's Note, Porn with Feelings, Safeword Use, Smut, Sub Liu Yang Yang, Top Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten, Under-negotiated Kink, bad things happen and they sort through them ok, but mentioned switching, but!!, not between TenYang tho, okay here we go, smangst?, trigger warnings all around</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:20:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,286</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26512963</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MVforVictory/pseuds/MVforVictory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He could feel Ten’s breath against his temple, hot and heavy and quickened by aggravation. “Are you going to disrespect me again?” Ten growled, “In front of the others, no less. I don’t appreciate that, baby.”</p><p>“M’not your baby,” YangYang bit out, “And what would you do? If I disrespected you again?” He asked, “What would you do? <i>Punish me?”</i></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Liu Yang Yang</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>377</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>touch me, tease me, fill me up</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/subbyyang/gifts">subbyyang</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>okay listen fuckos,</p><p>i didn't feel like detailing their relationship too much bc this didn't need to be any longer than it already got, and im also just lazy as shit so im putting it here.<br/><br/><b>Ten and YangYang's relationship wasn't written to seem inherently <i>romantic,</i> ya feel me? but obviously i don't care if it's read as such. but yeah i kinda wanted to take the dynamic they seem to have irl (very tom and jerry) and transfer that into this lovely work of <i>fiction</i>, so here i am.<br/></b><br/>oh yeah, and their dynamic in the beginning isn't like abusive or some shit, they were both under the impression that what they were doing (rough sex to take the stress away) was mutually beneficial, and it <i>was</i>, but somewhere along the way past events kinda warped YangYang's idea of what was happening</p><p>and like. don’t do this at home??</p><p>okay, now that that's out of the way...enjoy??</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>YangYang really had no idea how he got here. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He never really did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe it started with the teasing. An innuendo about Ten’s flexibility, a hand trailing up the elder’s thigh, maybe a well-placed bite or two—He had no idea. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A series of seemingly insignificant actions leading up to the current situation, with YangYang stripped naked and pressed face-down against the sheets of some hotel bed, held in place by Ten’s hand around his neck and a knee in his lower back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel Ten’s breath against his temple, hot and heavy and quickened by aggravation. “Are you going to disrespect me again?” Ten growled, “In front of the others, no less. I don’t appreciate that, baby.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“M’not your baby,” YangYang bit out, “And what would you do? If I disrespected you again?” He asked, “What would you do? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Punish me?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten couldn’t help but smirk at the mocking lilt to the younger boy’s voice, “Oh, no, sweetie. You’d like that too much, wouldn’t you? I bet you want nothing more than for me to keep you pinned like this,” he started, tightening his grip on the rapper’s throat, making YangYang wince at the pressure, “Pressing bruises into your pretty, little wrists as I bite down your shoulders. You’d cry out in pain, just like you always do, but you’d be begging for it </span>
  <em>
    <span>harder.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Asking me to fuck you </span>
  <em>
    <span>faster.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Until you’re screaming my name, fucked silly on my cock. That’s what you want, huh?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Squeezing his eyes shut, YangYang couldn’t help but moan at the memories laid out of before. Memories of Ten pressing his body against the mirrors of the practice room, taking him then and there as he was forced to hold himself open and watch the glide of Ten’s cock in his hole. Or when the older man had handcuffed him to a chair, rendering his hands useless and body immobile as Ten spread himself out on the bed before him, taking his sweet time playing with himself and </span>
  <em>
    <span>knowing</span>
  </em>
  <span> that YangYang was powerless to do anything but watch his Ten-Ge open himself up with some obscenely pink dildo.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby’s getting impatient,” Ten laughed, still holding YangYang’s hips in place as the younger boy tried rutting against the sheets in some desperate attempt to get any friction he could against his cock, left bare and weeping under their bodies. “But I make the rules, little sheep. Don’t forget that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He sat back, dragging his fingers in gentle trails down YangYang’s spine as the rapper whined below him. “Please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten-Ge. Please punish me,” he begged, “Been bad. Wan’ you to punish me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten tutted before scraping his teeth over the delicate skin of YangYang’s hip, “I already told you, baby. I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>punishing you. My way.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The dancer’s words were soft, sensual. Spoken in a complete contrast to how YangYang expected the night to go. They made his heart race in the worst way, mouth going dry and stomach turning as Ten pressed a kiss against the small of his back.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not going to break you, not tonight,” Ten informed him, “No. Instead, I’m going to take you apart, piece by piece, until you have nothing left to hide behind.” His fingers trailed lower, teasing and caressing and </span>
  <em>
    <span>soothing,</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang felt sick. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t want this. He didn’t deserve this. Panic ran heavily down his spine, following in the tracks Ten’s fingers created as they mapped his body with a familiarity that now made him want to gag. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten was not going to hurt him. YangYang </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten to hurt him. He wanted Ten to hurt him, to punish him, to turn him bruised and bloody because it’s what he </span>
  <em>
    <span>deserved.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>A finger pressed itself against the rim of his hole, feather-light and slick with too much lube. Usually Ten didn’t bother much with stretching, going as far as to assure no serious damage could come from it but only ever prepping to the point of precaution—Because that was what YangYang said he wanted. That’s what YangYang said he </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>But Ten wasn’t going to give him that. Not tonight. The security of their routine, the promise of bruises that linger and belt marks on his ass that make even just sitting a constant reminder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That’s what he wanted, because that’s what he knew. All he’s ever known.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s finger pushed deep, just rubbing against his walls for what felt like hours until YangYang clenched around it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“F-Faster,” he begged, “More.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Make it hurt.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhhh,” Ten rubbed the younger’s back in a few gentle, rhythmic circles before letting it fall still, “I’ve got you, baby boy. I’m going to take care of you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang shook his head. He wondered if Ten could feel his heart pounding beneath the hand that sits heavy on his back, the beat loud and erratic against his palm as YangYang struggled to breathe.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another finger settled in beside the first, taking their sweet time and savoring the warmth around them before finally separating as Ten began to work him open.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Such a good boy. So pretty for </span>
  <em>
    <span>hyung.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang whined at that—a low, keening sound slipping from his throat at the momentary shift into Korean. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was taken as a sound of pleasure, Ten taking the time to press his lips against each of the dimples on the younger boy’s back, “I’ve got you,” he said again, this time in soft-spoken English that made his toes curl with desire, “I want you to feel good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which was half of the problem. It </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> feel good. It felt amazing. Ten was amazing at what he did, he knew what felt good and what felt good but </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span> in just the way YangYang wanted, but this—this was unfamiliar territory.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The way Ten’s fingers slowly eased into him before pulling out and repeating, his other hand rubbing along his back and tracing out the same soft words the older boy was speaking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Except the pleasure wasn’t what YangYang was focusing on, not when it was twisted between the disgust and contempt he felt for himself—and for Ten, in that moment—waiting to be released like a rabid dog. Snarling and lunging forward in a desperate attempt to sink its teeth into something. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted to shove Ten away, but he was holding out on the chance that he would realize what he was doing wrong. He would see that YangYang didn’t deserve to be treated like this, like he was something to cherish, and he would take the cock that was pressed hot and heavy against YangYang’s thigh and fuck the younger with it until he was bleeding.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted Ten to wrap his fingers around YangYang’s throat and </span>
  <em>
    <span>squeeze,</span>
  </em>
  <span> sink his teeth in his skin, take everything that YangYang pretended he didn’t want to give. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted the fear that crawled up his throat in those moments, so high that he can’t breathe—while Ten sinks his cock in so deep, he can’t think.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Instead, Ten told him how good he’s being, how lovely YangYang felt clenching around his fingers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They spread him wide now, three deep and never stalling in their slow stroking inside him. His fingers have been inside YangYang for too long. He wanted them out. He wanted them </span>
  <em>
    <span>out.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>They barely skim his prostate with each stroke, feather-light touches that only do enough to coil heat in his stomach. YangYang tried to regulate his breathing but his harsh panting was too sporadic to calm.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look at you,” Ten hummed low in his throat, “Stretched so beautifully around my fingers.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang nearly mewled out, his body reacting on its own as his cock jerked and ass clenched at the introduction of a fourth finger. “P-Please—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhh, little one,” Ten whispered into his ear, “We’re gonna take it </span>
  <em>
    <span>slow,</span>
  </em>
  <span> hear me?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He pressed another kiss against YangYang’s neck, his familiar scent blanketing the younger boy’s senses with that same familiarity that made his breathing catch as he whined and bucked his hips forward.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Before Ten slid his fingers out all together, making YangYang whine </span>
  <em>
    <span>again</span>
  </em>
  <span> with a desperate clench as they fully slip out. The only thing worse than Ten keeping his fingers in him without moving them would have to be the emptiness that came from their removal.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The frantic sound was ripped from his chest again as Ten coaxed him onto his back. YangYang threw his arms over his eyes as Ten pressed him into bed again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I almost thought about changing plans and riding you,” Ten whispered into his neck, licking a line of sweat without a second thought before sitting back, “But I wouldn’t be able to hold myself back.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All sense of self preservation was warring against itself, but YangYang felt his tense body relax slightly at the feel of Ten’s nails digging into his thighs and pushing them up to his chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The moment of relief didn’t last, unfortunately, before Ten’s grip softened as he slid his hands up and along YangYang’s thighs, to his hips, before settling around his waist.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re so beautiful, little one,” Ten shifted his knees even farther apart, keeping the boy underneath him spread wide open for him, “Gonna take care of you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang pressed his forearm against his eyes harder. He didn’t want Ten to see the tears that were beginning to build, to see the fear he knew would show in them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This wasn’t what he wanted. What he deserved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>All night, he had poked and prodded and teased the older boy until his teeth were clenched and his face was red with anger. He had done everything he could think of to piss Ten off, because YangYang </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten to be angry with him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Angry Ten ripped his clothes off without a care and held him against the bed by his neck. Angry Ten fucked him hard and heavy, with lust and aggression and got off when YangYang started to cry. That’s what YangYang wanted.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Such a good boy for your </span>
  <em>
    <span>hyung,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten repeated with another kiss to YangYang’s collarbone as he slid his hips forward, pressing them fully against the back of the younger’s thighs. “I’m gonna fuck you know, baby boy. Are you ready?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“P-Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang could feel Ten’s cock between their bodies, sitting hot against YangYang’s own. The elder took his hand away from the rapper’s thigh to reach down, taking himself by hand and gently resting the tip against YangYang’s taint.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, baby,” Ten rubbed his other hand over YangYang’s sharp hipbone, “I’ll stop the second you tell me to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang grit out, voice sounding like it had been dragged through gravel, “P-Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten didn’t answer, but he did line the head of his cock up with YangYang’s hole, sliding slow and hot around it as he slicked himself up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was too slow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang’s legs end up wrapped around Ten’s waist, and he tried to use what leverage he can to pull the older forward and get him to finally </span>
  <em>
    <span>break him </span>
  </em>
  <span>but it wasn’t working. It wasn’t working. Ten stayed slow with his movements and YangYang felt like sobbing at the feeling of blunt pressure against his rim as he was pushed into.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>For a second, his body felt ice-cold. Like he couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t—</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Couldn’t do anything but wish for Ten’s fingers pressing into his throat as he struggled underneath him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhh, bǎobèi. You’re taking me so well, so perfect for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang wasn’t even sure what language was being spoken to him at this point, just like he couldn’t tell what he was responding in, anymore. All he could make out was the breathy tone of his own whimpers and his heart beating in his ears.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t long before Ten bottomed out, thighs once again flush with YangYang’s ass as he gave a slow rock of his hips. </span>
  <span>How couldn't he feel what YangYang felt? The terrifying need for </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>to fix the achy, hollow feeling in his chest. For something more than what Ten was going to give him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Du bist so dünn, Ich könnte deine handgelenke brechen.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His whole body was tense with fear, muscles taut and spine rigid at the voice that slips into his head. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Unter mir, bist du machtlos.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“So good for me, little one.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Ich werde dich zu meiner schlampe machen.’</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>His throat felt like it was closing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“P-Please,” he managed to pant out for what felt like the millionth time, “GeGe—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s hips gave a quick snap back, pulling out and taking whatever air YangYang held in his lungs with it, before pushing in at an angle that made the rapper’s thighs quiver.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, what?” Ten managed to get out, not sounding quite as composed as he would have liked, “What do you want, little one? Maybe if—fuck—maybe if you’re good, GeGe will give it to you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>’What do you want, little one?</span>
  </em>
  <span>’ Ten had asked. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>know.</span>
  </em>
  <span> He couldn’t say it, couldn’t think. Couldn’t do anything but shake with the effort to keep himself still, because he knew he wasn’t allowed to talk without being punished.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a flash of Ten’s dark hair as he stilled his hips. It wasn’t the same color as Elias’. It wasn’t, but YangYang couldn’t tell where the line had become so blurred between the two of them. Which bruise had pushed him back into that dark hallway.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Between Ten’s lithe body to Elias’ dark curls, so drastically different in appearance but YangYang’s skewed reality couldn’t help but mix the two like overlapped pictures on a roll of film, painting everything in sepia tones as the color drained away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ever since him and Ten started this, whatever </span>
  <em>
    <span>this</span>
  </em>
  <span> was, YangYang’s been living halfway between the memories of the past and the feelings of the present. Ten’s hands were smaller, sit against his throat differently but the pressure was the same. It was the same but it was different and YangYang couldn’t figure out which was the memory and which was attached to what he was currently feeling.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Every second had reality knocking at his door, waiting for YangYang to answer, to let it in. He wouldn't.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please,” YangYang gasped out, “Please fuck me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Hearing himself say it, </span>
  <em>
    <span>beg for it,</span>
  </em>
  <span> made him flush hot with shame and embarrassment, which was only worsened by Ten’s snort after.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you think I’m doing?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang wanted to shake his head, tell Ten he was wrong. He wasn’t fucking YangYang. He wasn’t fucking him because there wasn’t any pain, wasn’t any fingers pressing bruises into his throat, no teeth biting his lips bloody. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was just Ten, inside him. Barely moving. Choosing instead to drag the head of his cock against the stretch of YangYang’s walls, watching as the younger’s own dick weakly jerked at the teasing, sluggishly leaking precome onto his stomach.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby?” Ten asked, so </span>
  <em>
    <span>gently,</span>
  </em>
  <span> and everything came crashing down around him.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The rough cry shocked Ten into moving, only knowing he wanted to do whatever he could to get that sound again. He didn’t think anything quite would be as satisfying as YangYang lying underneath him, wet and submissive. He might even like it more than watching YangYang push back against him, like the brat he usually was. Like the brat Ten tried to fuck out of him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It never worked, but that was part of the fun. Like it was their own dirty, fucked-up game.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was a balance in it—what they share—with how unbalanced they are.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang clenched around Ten’s cock on each pull out, warm and wet and tight and so, so </span>
  <em>
    <span>perfect.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten made sure to tell him as much.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You look so good like this. Feels even better. Like you were born to take my cock,” Ten cooed, brushing his fingers along the younger’s cheek, “Good for nothing but this. My pretty, little fuck-toy.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel it building up, that same contempt from before yanking at the chain YangYang kept around it as his body flushed hot with emotion. It was impossible to hear anything over his own breaths, frantic and feverish, as everything burst forward.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang twisted away from Ten, eyes blown wide with a desperation the older boy wouldn’t understand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was almost enough to make Ten stop, but it wasn’t until YangYang’s hands fly up to Ten’s forearms, nails digging into his wrists in panic. “Baby?” Ten’s hips halted their movements, “Are you—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t—” YangYang cut him off with a ragged breath, “Don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>call</span>
  </em>
  <span> me that. I’m—I’m not—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was shaking, he distantly realized, hard enough that it should probably be concerning, but all he could think about was getting Ten’s hands off of him. He wants him, but he doesn’t. Not like this. Not like this. Not like this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang,” Ten hesitantly addressed him, “Tell me to stop, and I’ll stop. It’s okay, baby, but I need to know what you want me to do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There it was again. That god-forsakened </span>
  <em>
    <span>word.</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang would rather be called anything but that, at this point. That word wasn’t meant for him, he didn't know how Ten could say it without his mouth filling with an acrid, bitter taste.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby—”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang sobbed. His nails must have been carving into the Thai man’s skin, but that was the last thing he was focusing on. “Please, Ten. Please. Please, I—I need you to—something. Do </span>
  <em>
    <span>something,</span>
  </em>
  <span> please,” he babbled the words out between sobs, “P-Please, hyung. Hurt me—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yan—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, n-need—”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“YangYang,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten tried again, this time forcefully enough to quiet the younger boy’s messy pleas, “Listen to me. If this is hurting you, I’m going to stop. This isn’t meant to hurt, baby, this is meant to make you feel good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, that wasn’t right. It wasn’t right. That was the opposite of what YangYang wanted him to see. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten to hurt him, that was the whole point of their relationship. That was what he was </span>
  <em>
    <span>good</span>
  </em>
  <span> for. If he didn’t have that, what did he have? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He didn’t want to quit what him and Ten were doing. It made him useful. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>helped</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten. YangYang was his stress relief, and he was YangYang’s. If it was mutual, it was fine. YangYang wanted it, so why was Ten asking him if he wanted to stop?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten hurting him was what made him feel good. It meant YangYang was useful. He wanted Ten to need him—needed Ten to </span>
  <em>
    <span>want</span>
  </em>
  <span> him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang whispered, “Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted—</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His nails drew blood.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Touch me. Please, Tennie-hyung, please. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hurt me—”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s enough, YangYang,” Ten pleaded, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t—YangYang, look at me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang couldn’t understand what was </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong</span>
  </em>
  <span> other than Ten wasn’t fucking him. He didn’t know if he’d ever been this hard in his life, all he wanted is for Ten to lose control and fuck him like he meant it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Like YangYang deserved.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby, look at me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten gave his hips the slightest push, the slightest friction, but it was enough to make YangYang wail below him. Ten’s cock was stretching him so well, pressed so </span>
  <em>
    <span>fucking</span>
  </em>
  <span> deep inside him, but he wanted more. Needed more. Longed for the ache in his thighs and fire in his chest. He’d do </span>
  <em>
    <span>whatever </span>
  </em>
  <span>to get it. Anything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang, stop. Stop. Red. Red, look at me. Baby, listen—”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Red.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The word hit him like a punch to the gut, YangYang frantically shook his head as Ten started pulling out. He hooked his ankles around the older boy’s waist, anything to get him to </span>
  <em>
    <span>stay.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Maybe he didn’t deserve Ten. Didn’t even deserve Ten hurting him. That’s how bad he was. Not even worth a </span>
  <em>
    <span>punishment.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, hey, hey,” Ten breathed out, causing a shiver to run down YangYang’s spine, “I’m not going anywhere, baby. I’m right here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wanted to bite out </span>
  <em>
    <span>‘I’m not your baby,’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>for the second time that night, but couldn’t find the words. Couldn’t find the breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He couldn’t breathe. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>couldn’t breathe.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please. I don’t know what to do, Yangie,” Ten repeated, “Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang realized he was crying. They were both crying. Ten was sobbing something into his shoulder, curled protectively around the younger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another shiver. Another attempt to breathe. He couldn’t. Still couldn’t breathe. Ten’s voice sounded underwater, everything was too cold and too hot. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>There wasn’t much he could hear over the ringing in his ears now, but he could feel the sobs that continued to steal his breath away. His chest hurt. His chest hurt so fucking bad and he wanted it to stop.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhhhh, breathe, baby.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang didn’t know if he really managed to shake his head, or if everything else was shaking so much it just felt like he did. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A familiar hand </span>
  <em>
    <span>squeezed</span>
  </em>
  <span> his hip, but YangYang found himself jolting away from it. It burned. The touch burned. Ten’s touch </span>
  <em>
    <span>burned </span>
  </em>
  <span>him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“S-Should I go get Kun?” Ten frantically asked, “Or—Or Dery? What do you need, baby? Please, please just tell me what I can do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was strange to have Ten so obviously discomforted in his presence, which only further affirmed the fact that YangYang was probably ruining the very foundation their relationship stood upon. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“N-No—“</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was crying almost too much to gasp the words out, shaking all the way down to his bones and back up. It was terrifying, something YangYang never wanted to feel again, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>knew </span>
  </em>
  <span>he will. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten took in a ragged inhale, one YangYang only heard by how close the other’s mouth was to his ear, before collecting the rapper into his arms. Holding him tightly. Too tight. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel Ten’s arms trembling around him, could hear it in his voice. Was it from holding onto a still-shaking YangYang? Or had Ten fallen into the same pit of hell as him?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“C’mon, baby. Please. You’re scaring me,” Ten whispered, but YangYang only crumbled against his chest, looking every bit like his entire world was crumbling with him. “I—I love you Yangie. Ten loves you. So much, baby, so much that I only want you to be okay. I never wanna see you </span>
  <em>
    <span>cry—“ </span>
  </em>
  <span>His voice cracks, but he only cleared his throat and continued because YangYang’s eyes were at least open. They were open and not quite focusing on anything but it was worlds better than seeing them squeezed shut to block out Ten. “I never wanna be the one to—to make you cry. Not like this. I love you, baby. I just want you to be </span>
  <em>
    <span>okay.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten didn’t know how long he continued to talk, time lost to the pained wailing of the boy in his arms. He'd been doing nothing but murmuring whatever words come to mind as he pet along YangYang’s back, running his fingers through his hair at each breathy whine.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“M’sorry.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten flinched back at the harsh breath that followed, YangYang curling up even tighter against his chest, hands scrambling to clutch at </span>
  <em>
    <span>something.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Anything.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The sweat between their bare chests was disregarded entirely as Ten pulled YangYang to be laying entirely on top of him, “Oh my gosh, YangYang. Please, don’t ever scare me again like that. GeGe will do anything he can to keep you from ever feeling that way again. Okay, baby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang felt his breathing pick back up, shaking his head as rapidly as his tense muscles would allow, “S-Stop—Stop calling me t-that. Don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve—it—Don’t. Stop it. Please, stop calling me that. Please. Please. Please…” His voice died off, one final plea slipping past his lips.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stop it!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He tried to push himself from Ten’s hold but only managed to give him enough space to double over and just try to </span>
  <em>
    <span>breathe.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>One of Ten’s hands followed him over, keeping a hot palm against YangYang’s back. “Why don’t you want me calling you ‘baby’? Because you don’t ‘deserve’ it?” He calmly asked, subtly trying to pull the younger back against him, “Why do you keep saying that? What do you mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang squeezed his eyes shut, threading his fingers into his hair and pulling. The pain helped to ground him, gave him a spark of familiarity that was enough to pull him back to earth. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten hummed, low and soothing and YangYang hated it. “You don’t have to explain it, little one.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten wouldn’t understand. He wouldn’t understand anything YangYang could try to explain. Of course he wouldn’t. Ten was the closest thing to perfection a human could get. Ten was beautiful, and insanely talented. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He wasn’t dirty, or used, not like YangYang was. He didn’t have to sleep his way into a private school, just to be kicked out of the Performing Arts department after a mere few </span>
  <em>
    <span>months.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>If word of that ever released—Oh, </span>
  <em>
    <span>god. </span>
  </em>
  <span>YangYang would be ruined. He’d be at fault for destroying everything good the others had. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was only a matter of time. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you ever feel like…like you just don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>deserve </span>
  </em>
  <span>this?” YangYang rasped the question out, “Any of this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten paused, visibly thinking of how to respond, but his hands never stilled. They continued to trace letters into his side, ones YangYang couldn’t recognize, making him believe it to be something in Thai. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?...”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang groaned, grinding the palms of his hands against his eyes. He took another ragged breath, ignoring how Ten flinched back when the shakiness echoed around the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—I don’t know,” he grit out, “It’s all I can fucking think about anymore. I don’t—I don’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>deserve</span>
  </em>
  <span> this—all of this. What have I done to be where I am? Nothing </span>
  <em>
    <span>good.” </span>
  </em>
  <span>YangYang pressed harder, flashes of white static building in the expanse of nothingness he was surrounded by. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why don’t you think you deserve this, Yangie?” Ten asked him, voice choked as he tried speaking around the lump in his throat, “Do you not think you’ve earned this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No. I don’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten let out a sigh, saddened at the blank tone of his DeDe’s answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“By what merit do you think happiness is chosen? Who are you to decide that you’re not worthy of whatever it is you disagree with? If you really were such a bad person, I don’t think you would be here. I believe in Karma, and I believe life deals us some shit sometimes. But, whatever happened, I know you. I know you, my strong baby.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang flinched back at the word ‘baby,’ still not understanding how Ten could stand to call him that. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That slight recoil was more than enough for Ten’s sharp eyes to catch, “And what’s this? Why do you react so strongly when I call you ‘baby’? You’ve always claimed to hate it, but I know how it makes you </span>
  <em>
    <span>melt</span>
  </em>
  <span> in the dead of night, when you’re too tired to fight it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>don’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> hate it,” YangYang grit out, “That’s the whole fucking problem. I—I like it—I like it but I shouldn’t.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why shouldn’t you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because!” YangYang pushed Ten away from him, catching the elder by surprise and nearly forcing him off the bed and onto the floor. “I’m not! I’m not! I’m—I’m </span>
  <em>
    <span>not—”</span>
  </em>
  <span> He screamed, sobbed, cried out as he scraped his nails along his arms. “I’m not your baby! I’m not worth the—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang!” Ten shouted, cutting the younger boy off and making him stare with wide eyes, “Stop </span>
  <em>
    <span>saying </span>
  </em>
  <span>that,” the dancer pleaded, “I’m the only one that can decide that. If I say you’re my baby, then you’re my baby. That’s it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang tried shaking his head, but Ten crawled his way back to the center of the bed to grasp the younger’s face between his hands, gently shushing him as his breathing started to hitch again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shhhh, bǎobèi,” Ten breathed out, curling YangYang against his body and throwing the blankets over them. He didn’t care how hot it was underneath, he just wanted to keep YangYang safe in any way that he could. “Don’t cry, please. It’s okay—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>not!”</span>
  </em>
  <span> YangYang cried, pitiful sobs echoing in the room around them. Ten couldn’t understand someone like YangYang. Pain is all he’s known. Pain is all he’s ever going to know. “I—I don’t know who I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>anymore.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re my baby,” Ten whispered, holding YangYang closer as he tried to stop the boy from shaking out of his skin. “You don’t have to be anything more than that, as long as you’re with me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten held him as he cried. For what felt like hours. It took everything in YangYang’s power not to push him away, </span>
  <em>
    <span>again.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Just a scant few months ago, when all of this had been new, and Ten was merely putting YangYang in his place—he had dreaded waking up next to the dancer. Waking up next to </span>
  <em>
    <span>anyone.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>It brought him back to before. The days he would wake up, sticky and sweaty. When he could still feel whatever substance flowing through his veins, leaving him dizzy and nauseous and covered in dried semen and spit and whatever other fluids YangYang couldn’t remember, couldn’t even </span>
  <em>
    <span>stomach</span>
  </em>
  <span> thinking about. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Unwanted hands roaming his body, never letting him forget. Bruises painting his skin. Fingers and tongues and cocks shoved into him, tears and spit drying on his face and never coming off. YangYang had lost count of how many times he tried to scrub himself clean on the mornings following.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love you, little one,” Ten whispered against his hair, “I wish you’d just talk to me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to calm his shuddery breaths as he pulled away slightly, “I’m fine.” Still scrubbing at his face, trying to claw off the dried tears and semen that was no longer there, but he could still </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel</span>
  </em>
  <span> it clinging to his skin. He wished he scratch his skin off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang, stop that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He felt Ten gently pull his hands away, YangYang’s eyes widened at the sight of the red marks his nails must have dug into Ten’s arms as he clung onto them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m okay,” YangYang said, like he was trying to convince Ten—Convince himself that it was true. Because it was true. YangYang was fine. He was fine. He was— </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please, </span>
  </em>
  <span>baby. Talk to me,” Ten pleaded, frowning at the boy in front of him, “You’re not okay, we can both see that. Just—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Talk to you?” YangYang laughed, incredulous at the thought. Ten could never understand something like this. Someone like him. “About </span>
  <em>
    <span>what?</span>
  </em>
  <span> There’s nothing to talk about. Okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He could feel Ten’s eyes burning into him, but YangYang refused to to pull his glare away from where Ten was still gripping onto his hands. It was clear he wasn’t buying any of what YangYang was saying, however. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I hate that you’re so fucking reserved around us,” Ten muttered, making YangYang stiffen and attempt to pull away again, but the dancer stopped him as he tightened his hold, “We want to help you, YangYang. You know that? We can hear it at night, when you wake up crying and immediately run to the shower. We can hear that, and we never pry because we’re scared of making you pull away. Please, just talk to us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And then what?” YangYang threw back, “All my problems are just fixed? That’s not how it works, Okay? It’s not just gonna…</span>
  <em>
    <span>magically</span>
  </em>
  <span> get better if more people know.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Have you ever talked about it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang was silent. No, he’s never said anything. And he’s thankful he hadn’t. Speaking out would have meant an end to his career before it even began.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s eyes softened, “That’s what I thought. It’s eating away at you. Please, please, baby. Open up, we won’t judge you. You </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, he didn’t. He didn’t know that. YangYang didn’t know anything anymore. He knew what happened, he knew how that made him feel. How it made </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Dirty and used. A liar. Undeserving.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I lost my virginity in middle school.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten stayed silent, waiting for YangYang to compose himself enough to continue. So continue he did.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It started with one. He wasn’t out, but said he could see it in me. Something special. He said I was different,” YangYang recalled, voice hollowed out, just like his chest. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten reached out, likely planning on touching him but a quick jerk of his head stopped it. YangYang didn’t know if he could take Ten touching him right now, but he grabbed the older boy’s hand anyway because he didn’t know if Ten would be able to stomach touching him after listening to what he was about to say. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And then he starting bringing me to parties. I met his friends. They were all older than me, but they said if I hung around them, I could be cool, and—and people would </span>
  <em>
    <span>like</span>
  </em>
  <span> me. They got me really drunk one night, and I c-couldn’t—I couldn’t—couldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>stop them.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, no,” Ten whispered, pity dampening his eyes as he pet over YangYang’s hands.   </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s why I can’t stand feeling dirty. Or being in dirty sheets. Because I can still </span>
  <em>
    <span>feel</span>
  </em>
  <span> it. Sticking to my skin no matter how much I try to wash it away. It never leaves,” YangYang had started out hollow, haughty, almost like he was baring his torment with the intent to prove to Ten just how wrong he was.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But every word, every one of his dirty, disgusting secrets to come forward, suffocated him beyond his wildest imagination.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“YangYang, you were </span>
  <em>
    <span>raped—”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shut up,” YangYang hissed, “It wasn’t—It wasn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>like</span>
  </em>
  <span> that. It—It wasn’t—</span>
  <em>
    <span>Rape.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>The second the word spilled past his lips, YangYang felt every ounce of composure he held slip away as the gentle concern in Ten’s eyes was replaced with something darker. Something angrier. His eyebrows knitted together as his jaw clenched in disgust. Exactly what YangYang was expecting to see. Hatred and disgust because he was vile and deserved nothing but pain and loathing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll kill them.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, every muscle in YangYang’s body snapped, tension lost it a split second as his body pitched forward against Ten’s chest, nails dragging along his back and he attempted to press himself as close as possible.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They had no right to do that to you,” Ten assured, bracing an arm around YangYang’s back and a hand on the back of his head, “I love you so much, baby. You deserve nothing but good things, you hear me? Nothing.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang shakily exhaled, staring unseeing as Ten’s fingers began to card through his hair. He was practically choking on the relief. Ten didn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>hate</span>
  </em>
  <span> him. Foolishly, it was all YangYang had hoped for. To not be hated, to not be cast aside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s hand brushed down his cheek, thumb wiping away the tears that were still steadily falling from YangYang’s eyes. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—” His voice wavered, lower lip trembling as he tried to hold back his own tears, “Oh, god. I’ve been doing nothing but </span>
  <em>
    <span>hurting</span>
  </em>
  <span> you, YangYang. Why—Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you stop me? Baby, you—I’m no better than they are if—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, no, no, no,” YangYang hurried to press his own hands against Ten’s paled face, “I wanted this—everything we’ve done—I’ve wanted it. You’re the only person who’s ever touched me with </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> consent.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The words had the near opposite effect YangYang meant for them to have, Ten’s face crumpled at the realization as he began to outright sob, “B-Baby, I need you to know—how much I care for you. You’re so amazing, Yangie, and I love you so much.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ten-Ge—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, baby,” Ten cut off his attempt at refuting it, “I’m not going to stop until you believe me when I say that you deserve nothing but love and respect, and that’s all I want to give you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten stilled, surprise pulling the words from him, like he was expecting YangYang to argue more. “Okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang nodded, “Show me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Inhaling sharply, Ten opened his mouth before quickly closing it again and swallowing, “Are you sure?” He asked, trying to read YangYang’s gaze for any uncertainty there, but the younger boy held strong, “Okay, little one. I’m gonna take care of you. Your Ten-Ge is gonna make you feel so good, bǎobèi, but only if you’re positive.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang nodded as he leaned forward into Ten, resting his forehead against the dancer’s shoulder, “Yeah, m’sure.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, but </span>
  <em>
    <span>please, </span>
  </em>
  <span>tell me if you wanna stop.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten waited for him to nod again before leaning down to kiss him, slow and long and deep. His fingers continued to gently scratch at the short hairs at the back on YangYang’s nape as he helped to gently adjust the boy over top of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang whimpered as Ten began trailing kisses along his jaw and neck, making him shiver at the praise being whispered into his skin as he rocked down against the older boy, “More,” he whined, “Please, GeGe.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The kisses traveled down, flaring across his collarbones with gentle nips as Ten grinned against the rapper’s skin. YangYang arched into the touch, offering up as much of his body to Ten as he could in that moment. He wanted Ten to touch him all over, he </span>
  <em>
    <span>wanted</span>
  </em>
  <span> it.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There was still the dark, little voice in the back of his head, telling him that he didn’t deserve the gentleness and the care that Ten was showing him, but the dancer didn’t even give YangYang time to listen before his teeth scraped over the sensitive skin of his nipple.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Such a good boy for me, Yangie,” Ten praised him, running his hands up from YangYang’s thin waist, “So perfect, baby. Fit so well in my arms.” He continued to whisper the words between kisses, letting YangYang press his head closer into his chest as he rocked over his thigh, “Are you sure?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang let out a quiet huff, “You were the first person to ask me that. I trust you. Now, are you gonna fuck me or not?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I love when you get bratty,” Ten laughed softly, pulling back just enough to look the younger in the eyes, “But, seriously, baby. If you don’t like something, tell me. I’ll stop.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang blew his bangs up in exasperation, trying to hide the flush of his cheeks from gratitude. “Fine, just—do </span>
  <em>
    <span>something,</span>
  </em>
  <span> please. Don’t just stare,” he mumbled, feeling the anxiety of before threatening to choke him again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten hummed out an apology, dragging the sheets to cover as much of the younger boy as he could in their position, “I’m sorry, little one. Hyung didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” Ten leaned forward to press a remorseful kiss against YangYang’s throat, “Thank you for telling me, baby. I’m really proud of you for doing that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang nodded, stilling his rocking as Ten gripped his hips. The dancer gave himself a few short tugs, trying to get hard again, before circling the head at YangYang’s entrance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You ready, baby?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Please.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>He closed his eyes, letting every thought slip away, every doubt he had. Forcing out everything that wasn’t just how much he wanted Ten to fuck him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang shakily inhaled at the familiar pressure of Ten pushing into him, hands still curling into fists even as the stretch was barely felt. His breath always hitched at the full feeling of the older boy pressing into him, a feeling he loved even more than feeling Ten come apart </span>
  <em>
    <span>around</span>
  </em>
  <span> him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten pressed one last kiss just below YangYang’s jaw as he guided the younger down to sit flush against his hips, “Hyung’s got you, baby, just let go,” making YangYang bury his face in Ten’s shoulder as another wave of pleasure washed over him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He opened his mouth to say something, but snapped his jaw shut with an audible </span>
  <em>
    <span>click</span>
  </em>
  <span> after a second thought. Just earlier in the night, he had had no problem begging for it </span>
  <em>
    <span>harder, faster,</span>
  </em>
  <span> like the slut he was, except now—now he was scared. Scared of upsetting Ten. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby?” Ten asked, seeming to sense something was wrong as he stilled the gentle rocking of his hips, “Is everything okay? Should we stop?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” YangYang blurt, “No, please don’t stop. Please.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, but you have to tell me what’s wrong.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I—” YangYang paused, “I want you to hold me tighter.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“T-Tighter?” Ten stuttered, the request taking a second to sink in before he immediately complied, pressing YangYang even closer to his body, keeping an arm tight around his lower back, “Alright, baby. I can do that. Hyung’s got you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang grasped onto Ten’s shoulders like his life depended on it, rolling his hips down, pressing their bodies impossibly close as he rocked down again, desperately trying to get Ten to pick his rhythm back up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No matter how hard YangYang squeezed Ten’s shoulder, begging for </span>
  <em>
    <span>something,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten stayed slow. Kept YangYang just barely from tipping over the edge.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wouldn’t take much to push him, his body felt supercharged and overworked, and he wanted nothing more than to reach that high and lose himself to the feeling. Ten’s cock sliding in and out, in and out, in and out, until it became almost impossible for YangYang to lift himself up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang squeezed Ten’s shoulder in an effort to ground himself, hating himself for expecting the dancer to mock him but Ten only quietly shushed him before laying him back against the sheets.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s okay, baby. You did so good. So, so good for me, Yangie.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A low, broken whine slipped past his lips as Ten pressed against his prostate, barely giving YangYang time to breath as he repeated the action, over and over and over again until he was left a wrecked, panting mess.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten lowered himself onto his elbows, brushing a strand of YangYang’s bangs away all too softly for the lewdness of the sounds echoing around the room. “You’re so pretty, little one,” he pressed an open mouth kiss to the rapper’s throat, nipping just under his clenched jaw, “I love you like this, when you’re being so good, just for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang couldn’t help the pride that settled heavily in his chest at being the subject of Ten’s adoration. Hearing Ten’s usually-sharp tongue whisper gentle, loving words into his skin covered his body in chills.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He almost felt overwhelmed with gratitude, thankful that it was </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ten </span>
  </em>
  <span>that he was trusting himself to, cheeks flushing with bashful-redness as he turned his head to the side to hide from Ten’s intense gaze.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He no longer had his walls to hide behind, now that the truth behind them had been shared. His mask was gone. Ten had taken it and thrown it somewhere far, far away. YangYang felt exposed, but being with Ten helped.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten continued pushing in and out, going deeper with every thrust as YangYang pawed at his shoulders with a breathy whine. They settled into a steady rhythm, clashing against each other like two contrasting waves. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So good, Yangie. Such a good boy for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Moans spilled from his lips at the praise, tears falling from his eyes as Ten tenderly kissed them away. YangYang almost couldn’t comprehend it—this feeling, something that had once felt humiliating and underserved, now made his stomach twist in a different way.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He let out a sharp cry as Ten pressed against his prostate again, incessantly hitting it as YangYang’s nails dig into his back, scratching and clawing in tandem with the dancer’s movements. The pressure was building, YangYang could feel it. Pooling in his stomach as it climbed all the way up his throat, making it hard to breathe in the best way as he gasped out Ten’s name.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m here, baby,” Ten grunted, “I’ve got you. So good, baby, So good.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was enough to push YangYang over the edge, plummeting into the haze at the bottom as he babbled out Ten’s name over and over, until if felt the older man tense up and join him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten collapsed into YangYang’s neck, breathing heavily as he continued to whisper praises, waiting for the youngest to come down again as he traced circles into his chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dancer thighs,” YangYang started with a breathless sigh, “Are a godsend.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten snorted at him, the corners of his lips just barely pulling up into the grin he was trying to hold back, “Was everything okay?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even after finding out, YangYang was still Ten’s first priority. The thought weighed heavy on his mind, but he couldn’t help but feel grateful, even though he still wasn’t entirely sure he deserved such a thing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had half a mind to say something snarky back, but couldn’t find it in himself to ruin the peaceful aura settling around them, so he pushed down the temptation. “Yeah…I’m okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten exhaled in relief as he pushed himself up, kissing YangYang long and slow, before pulling back to rest his forehead against YangYang’s temple, rolling them over just enough to drag the younger’s body into his own, “We still need to talk about everything,” he murmured, gently petting the rapper’s back when he tensed up, “And I think you should tell Kun, at least some things.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’ll be with me?” YangYang asked, nuzzling ever closer to the dancer’s body. He felt a strange layer of calm settle over him, covering the agitation that he usually felt buzzing under his skin at all times. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wouldn’t last, he knew it wouldn’t last. It was only a matter of time before it returned, but for now YangYang was going to let himself bask in the quiet of his mind.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course,” Ten grinned, “You’re my baby. It’s gonna take a lot more than that to get rid of me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Now, YangYang actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>did</span>
  </em>
  <span> roll his eyes. He felt lighter, somehow. Like the reassurance that being used didn’t always mean broken, or dirty, “Shut up and gimme something to clean this off,” he said, grimacing at the reminder of fluids sticking to his skin, but the self-loathing and disgust that usually followed never did, but he still didn’t think he was okay with the feel of Ten’s cum slowly trailing down the back of his thighs, “Maybe…Maybe next time…Can we use a condom?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s eyebrows perked up before his expression softened, “Of course, baby. I should’ve asked first. I’m sorry.” He pressed another apology-kiss to YangYang’s temple before asking, “Do you wanna take a bath? I can try to do something about the sheets after?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah…I’d like that.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten grinned, scooping YangYang up and settling him on his hip like they weren’t practically the same size and carrying him to the washroom, “See, you are my baby,” he said, noting the way he was carrying the younger boy.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Put me down, jackass,” YangYang laughed, wiggling as he was set utop the sink counter, trying not to shiver at the lack of Ten’s body heat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He watched as Ten, still entirely naked, turned the tap of the hot water on before loading up the stream with soap, letting it swirl in with the water as it collected at the bottom.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just like the soap, he felt the warmth swirl in his stomach at how easy it was like this. How naturally him and Ten seemed to fit together when they weren’t constantly sinking their teeth into one another’s throats. YangYang liked it like this.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was something he didn’t know if he was ever going to have, but here he was, and here Ten was just in front of him. Bare ass on display for YangYang to reach forward and hit with a playful slap.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, listen,” Ten turned back to face him, soapy hands reaching for the rapper as he tried to fight him off, “I hold the power here.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh,” YangYang smirked, “Should I get Kun? I’m sure he’d be more than happy to put you in your place.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten huffed, pushing at YangYang’s chest in jest, “I could dom Kun…”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Could </span>
  </em>
  <span>you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yah!” Ten indignantly responded, pushing YangYang for a second time and crowding him against the mirror, “I’ll have you know—”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The tub is about to overflow.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shit!” Ten jumped away to dive for the faucets, almost slipping on the tiles to turn off the stream of water, “That was your fault. Gremlin.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How’s it my fault? </span>
  <em>
    <span>You</span>
  </em>
  <span> were the one that wasn’t paying attention!” YangYang kicked at Ten’s back, </span>
  <em>
    <span>actually </span>
  </em>
  <span>making him lose his balance and forcing him to grab onto the side of the tub for stability. He glared back at the rapper, but seeing YangYang laugh at him was enough to make him smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, but can you really blame me? When you’re here, like this. Just for me.” Ten winked, snaking his arms around YangYang’s waist and pulling him forward off the counter. “Only I get to see you like this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sweaty and covered in cum?”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Exactly,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Ten grinned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>YangYang couldn’t suppress his own smile as he could feel Ten’s laugh buzzing between their bodies. It should disgust him, being held against the dancer’s body. Sweaty skin to sweaty skin. But it didn’t.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They managed to separate enough for YangYang to carefully slip into the water, feeling the heat immediately begin to seep into his aching muscles as he relaxed into it. Ten settled in behind him, reaching forward to pull a boneless YangYang to lean back against his chest.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You know I love you, right?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Duh,” YangYang mumbled, arching his back as Ten dragged a soapy cloth across his chest, “You say it enough.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Ten’s hand stilled, “But…But do you believe it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. I think I do.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>me, a sub-Ten enthu: <i>*writes this*</i><br/>yeah idk why this exists either </p><p>please leave a comment or kudos if u didn't hate it, and check out my other works if you're interested in iKON and Stray Kids~~</p><p>luv ya</p><p>follow me on Twitter <a href="https://twitter.com/MVforVictory">@MVforVictory</a> ~~</p></blockquote></div></div>
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